Friday, November 6, 2015

The One About Matthew

I quoted a movie line last November that said, in essence, the hardest part of parenting is letting go.  I can't say definitively that it's the hardest; I’m willing to concede that there could be something more difficult down the road.  However it’s certainly been the hardest part for me so far.

When our firstborn left three years ago, it was rough because everything was new; it was a season of firsts.   First college visits, first applications, first time one of the littles left the roost, first holiday or special occasion without the four of us being together...first everything.  Oh, and it was even the first serious illness!  It never occurred to me when we left him that he'd contract and fight something significant that would entail hospital visits, narcotics, and the eventual medical leave of absence from school.  There were so many firsts and it really did take a while to get used to the new dynamic.

When our younger son left this past August, it was brutal in a whole new way, as everything seemed like a last.  All throughout his senior year, really, I struggled with the lasts.  Last birthday (for me) with any of my children living with me, last Mother's Day with a kid home, last drive to the high many lasts.  While (thankfully) they come home to visit, it's never quite the same once they're adults and have been living on their own.  We truly did close the door to a significant chapter in our lives and it's been rather difficult to navigate at times.  It's been very hard to let go.

I must say though, there’s a certain peace that comes with knowing that your child is in the best possible place.  (This applies to John too, but I'm going to speak of Matthew now.)

When we began looking for a new church home almost four years ago, I had no idea that the Lord was already setting His plan for Matthew's (college) life into motion.  Looking back, there were so many things that worked together and led Matthew to Westmont College.  It really was (and continues to be) an answer to prayer.  I miss Matthew terribly, but I can honestly say that he is at Westmont because Christ used some phenomenal people and opened some pretty big doors to allow him to be there.  He's right where God wants him to be, of that I am certain.  And that is a pretty wonderful thing.

I'm so thankful to be up here for the weekend.  I love him so very much.  

Somebody is tired and not in the mood to have his picture taken!
This was right before we headed in to Multivariable Calculus and my head exploded.

After dinner we had to come back to the hotel and save the world.
You can sleep well tonight; all four diseases have been eradicated.
You're welcome.

There's the face I love.

The tables have turned!  I'm the one who is tired now!

Such a great day; I can't wait to see what tomorrow's adventures bring!
(Spoiler alert....the next few posts might just be more pictures.  Don't say I didn't warn you.)

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